10 Bad Habits You Didn’t Know were Sabotaging You

In one of my favorite books Atomic Habits, author James Clear says that habits add up like compound interest. They can add up to something good like the completion of a goal or they can add it to a lifetime of missed opportunities and negative feelings. I firmly believe that it’s never too late to stop a bad habit and learn a new one we all have the ability to learn and grow and become better people in the process. Let’s explore what these bad habits are and how we can change.

I think this guy must of read the bible….

  1. Waiting for ” Some Day’

Some dayI’m going to….

…..start exercising

…..begin that project 

…..start eating healthy

…..start my own business

…..go on that vacation

…..be happy

Have you done this before? This bad habit may be the biggest sources of self sabotage. Many of us tell ourselves..”well someday I will___”  or “when I have___ I’ll be happy” and when we wait and wait and wait and someday never comes are expectations of our reality breaks our heart. We never end up reaching our dreams.

What you can do instead:

When you catch yourself thinking “someday I’ll ___” stop and say “I want ____ and this is how I’ll take steps to get there. Your actions will show how much you really want it. So take a step back and analyze your wants and needs then proceed. 

     2.Wanting someones else’s life

Comparison is truly the thief of personal joy. 

It’s so easy to compare yourself to other people and social media being so integrated into our daily lives, but the thing is one part there Monday and boring every day stuff online. Everything is carefully planned, posed, and edited to the point where it isn’t even real anymore. 

From our stand point someones life may look perfect because they may have something we want but we don’t realize the struggles they face or what it took to get to where they’re at.

Realistically, no one has the perfect complexion, spouse, job, children, diet, body, or home. We are all flawed human beings doing the best we can with what we’ve got.

What you can do instead:

Take a break from social media and use that mental energy brainstorming ways to make your life better. Not the way society has brainwashed us in but creating a life that is authentic and reflects what you truly want deep inside. Appreciate what you have now even if it’s not perfect. When you are content you find more happiness. 

      3. Doubting yourself

Self doubt is one of the heaviest weights we can carry in life. Go to the gym and carry weights purposely.

Feeling you’re not worthy enough, not skilled enough, not smart enough, etc. holds us back from so many amazing opportunities life has to offer us.

It all comes from limiting believes we’ve learned in our past and those negative thought patterns that stay with us until we confront them and make a conscious choice to change them.

What you can do:

When you notice those thoughts and feelings, when they pop up, without judging them, gently replace them with empowering thoughts.

So when I notice myself thinking I’m not qualified enough to get this job, you can tell yourself I am more than qualified for this position, and anything I don’t know I can learn. 

Put aside your phone and focus on a skill you will like to learn. Stay consistent.

Listen to things will lift you up, whether its movies, podcasts, music, friends…..

      4. Procrastinating

We all have this bad habit.

When you should be getting things done we sometimes get distracted lazy or tired and end up binge watching Netflix or Tik Tok. Thats totally OK, that’s perfectly imperfectly human, but we all know we could procrastinate a little less.

There is nothing productive about beating yourself up for not being productive. It can take some experimenting to find the productivity method that works for you. 

What you can do: 

Make yourself accountable to yourself, if thats not good enough then choose a trusted friend. When you make yourself accountable you feel the need to get it done and not put it aside. 

I like to imagine all the free time i get for myself once I’m all done.

      5. Caring about what other people think

This one hits home, in a painful way. As a Teenager I cared what other people thought about me because as an introverted child I wanted to fit in. Kids are mean, you know?!

If you have this bad habit of obsessing over what other people think of you I have some good news for you no one is spending their time and energy thinking about you.

As, an adult now, meaning through my experience I can say forget them… it’s like I dont even know them know.

No one is remembering that embarrassing thing you did in front of them, if they even notice it at all. People are so wrapped up in their own lives they don’t have the time and energy to put much thought into yours.

The people who love you are the only people you should care about.

What you can do:

Don’t let someone dictate your life. Remember, when you base your actions around what other people think you give away your power.

Go get that job you’ve always wanted!

Go live in that sprinter and travel!

Make that youtube channel and share your knowledge!

You get the point!

      6. Thinking instead of doing

Do you spend more time thinking about doing a thing and then actually take the time to do it?

Do days or weeks go by and you’re still thinking “I really need to do that thing when you could have done it ages ago?” Or maybe it’s been hours making a list and writing in your planner, but then don’t actually get much accomplished. I still catch myself dwelling on some things when I could just get it over with, if there is something you’ve been wanting or needing to do for a while do it today or just schedule it in your calendar right now get it done and stuff wasting your mental energy on it. Easier said than done right? That’s why we keep putting off. Basically it’s procrastinating again.

This on the level of just thinking about it. Maybe you just don’t know how to get it done. Or you’re replaying different scenarios in your head and by the time you’re done, it’s time for bed. 

What you can do:

Sometimes our thoughts can look abstract and not very clear, in other words, when we continue to think about them over and over again. So a great strategy that I like to use is to write all my thoughts down. Once you can see your thoughts on paper then you know whether it’s worth thinking about, you can make a plan and then you can execute.

      7. Trying to multitask

We would like to think we can multitask. That we are super heroes and we can do 3 things at once.

You think you can listen your wife and be on your phone scrolling through IG.

You think you can cook and watch your favorite drama show.

Do you go to the gym to get fit and at the same time read a book? Can’t do it.

Then you’ll have to repeat the same things by putting aside the phone, the show and the book.

You best do it right the first time.

People who multitask are actually less productive than people who focus on one task at a time.

What you can do:

Next time you have a multiple things to do focus on completing on before moving onto the next. The way you don’t waste time.

      8. Judging others

It’s all too easy to make judgments about other people when you aren’t walking in their shoes and sometimes we assume someone has the worst intentions when they really don’t.

I’ve come to realize most of us are doing the best we can with the tools available to us we were all taught different, our culture can differ, born with the different privileges and gifts, most people are just trying to survive the day.

Usually when someone is unkind it’s not even about you it’s about them something is going on in their life or happened in their past to influence their behavior and it has nothing to do with you.

What you can do:

So when you get impatient with or offended by someone try to remember that they are doing their best and maybe they just have different priorities than you.

Smile to ease the situation.

That doesn’t mean you have to tolerate abusive behavior never let anyone cross that line but learn to let things go because often it’s not about you and it’s not worth your energy.

      9. Wasting money on stuff

This society is a money hungry gov. social media, influencers spend all there time promoting products that they say we need, so it’s no surprise shopping becomes a bad habit.

An influencer tells us just buy those and you’ll be happy but we all know that having this or that doesn’t cause lasting happiness. Once you get the item you have to find a spot to store it or after you order it that happiness flies out the window.

What you can do:

Ask yourself will having that item improve your life? Do we really need new clothes every month? Does anyone need 17 handbags or eyeshadow palette? Am I even going to use it for more than a week?

Additionally consumerism is taking a heavy toll on our planet. Trash in the ocean is killing marine life. Landfills are overwhelmed with fast fashion. Kids are dying in mines that people so people can have a new phone every year. When you see something you want to buy think about the resources that were used and the future waste they will create when you throw it away. It definitely helps me to shop more selectively.

      10. Living in the past

Our past shapes us in so many ways, but sometimes dwelling on the past can cause a lot of pain.

It takes us away from our present moment and keeps us from moving forward. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has laid awake at night staring into the dark of abyss off the my room thinking about something that happened in the past, it’s not fun or productive. so whyyyyy???

What to do:

Whether it’s somebody who has caused you pain or your own actions that you regret, when they start, gently redirect your mind to the present moment and remember negative thoughts don’t serve you in any way and it’s OK to let them go.

Let the man.go…..

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